Monday, September 06, 2004

How am I supposed to tell a story in less than 150 characters?

I just did my profile and my random question was The children are waiting, tell them the story of the bald frog and the wig. I misread it at first and thought it said the bad frog and the wig but then I fixed my error and wrote this. Sadly it is way over the 150 character maximum so it makes it's debut as a post instead.


Once upon a time when we all lived in the forest and nobody lived anywhere else there lived a very sensitive frog.

All his life this frog had heard people ask the question "how are you?" and heard the reply of "Fine as frog hair." The poor frog hung his head in shame every time he heard this expression because he had no fine frog hair. He was as bald as the day is long.

He took to hiding deep in his pond so nobody would know about his terrible condition. When he did venture forth he put mud upon his head in a vain attempt to simulate dreadlocks.

One day as he was hopping down the road the sun came out from behind the clouds and dried his mud to nothing but dirt. His beautiful natty dreads were no more! He was just a frog with dirt on his head.

For one heartbreakingly long moment he thought he would cry but no, he dug deep into his froggy heart and pulled out some courage. He dusted himself off and hopped on his way again. Soon he came to a little girl spinning wool as she watched her sheep.

"Greetings my fine frog" she said. "How fare you this day?"

"I'm splendid" he replied. "Indeed I would be beyond splendid if you would spare me a little wool to make a wig for my poor bald head."

"Oh no" said the moppet. "Chicks dig guys who are all about confidence. They don't dig guys who are fake. Forgo the wig my little friend and go ye and pull in the chicks without artificial aid."

And that is precisely what the frog did. He went on to father countless billions of tadpoles and died a legend at a ripe old age.

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